The Impossible Command of Jesus Love Those Who've Hurt You

[Ramez5]

He that says he is in the light, and hates his brother, is in darkness even until now. He that loves his brother stays in the light, and there is none occasion of stumbling in him. But he that hates his brother is in darkness, and walks in darkness, and knows not where he goes, because that darkness has blinded his eyes. 1 John 2:9-11

Last year, I attended a political event, and while there saw someone I hadn't seen in many years. The Lord had been working in a powerful way in my heart that year, and I knew I ought to go say Hi. But to my shame, I didn't. This person was a brother in Christ. Someone who had hurt me and my family repeatedly through their own foolishness and dysfunctional situation. It had become an 'infamous moment' in our family history--that month when we opened our home to strangers.

This morning, as I was reading these verses, that scenario immediately popped in my head! I thought there was no one whom I 'hated'. I certainly didn't think I 'hated' them, I just didn't particularly 'like' them. I didn't want to have fellowship with them.

To be honest, I was deceiving myself, but it took looking in the mirror of God's word, to be reminded of the my lack of love and my disobedience to the Lord's command.


'Not hating a brother' is not going far enough. Jesus' command was that we actively 'love' our brothers. In fact I've discovered that the easiest way to get over bad feelings for someone is to start blessing them as Jesus commanded us to do to our enemies.--to pray for them and do them good.

Everyone has someone they're tempted to hate--someone who has hurt them--maybe repeatedly. If we don't have Christ's love empowering us and we've never accepted the love of Christ, then there is no way we could ever forgive them.

Jesus commands are impossible for non-Christians to fulfill. They are also impossible for we Christians to fulfill apart from His grace.

How many of us, who call ourselves Christians, are also unable to forgive and actively love someone in our current or past situation?


For most of my life, I know I functioned the way many of my Christian brothers and sisters have--loving my friends and trying hard not to think about those who had hurt me in the past--or trying to change and correct those who I felt were hurting me in the present.

But you can't read 1 John and not realize that that sort of love is selfish love and is no different than the world's love. Jesus told us that even the world loves those who love them back. And some good people, will still be polite and even attempt to forgive and forget those who have hurt them and put on the happy face.

Because we all agree that we ought to forgive others--that forgiveness is a right thing to do. But actively loving those who have hurt us is a thing only Christ can do through us and it's proof that He is living in our hearts when we walk that out.


John knew that even Christians would be tempted to reject, ignore, dislike, or even actively hate their brothers, if the situation was difficult enough. So he tells us flat out--if you hate your brother and don't love them--your walking in darkness no matter how much you think you're walking in the light.


You can't fake genuine forgiveness nor can you fake genuine love. In fact, it's impossible for anyone to forgive others the way Jesus commands us to do. It's a fruit of the Spirit. It's a gift that results from daily abiding in Christ and his Word, surrendering to his Lordship and dying to self. Jesus has to fill you with His love--and we have to choose to walk that kind of love out.

Your love, humanly speaking, has it's limits. If you don't realize that yet, I can promise you that the Lord will test you, so you have no choice but to cry out to Him for that love.


If you are experiencing conflict in your home, church, school, marriage, or with children, there is only one proper response--love--unconditional and Christ-like love.

As long as you are being selfish and trying to get your needs met or your rights respected, you are not dying to your self as Christ commanded, and you're not loving your brother.
We say we don't 'hate' our brother--or someone who has offended us--

but do we actively love them?

Those who walk in hatred and enmity to believers, remain in a dark state. Christian love teaches us to value our brother's soul, and to dread every thing hurtful to his purity and peace. Where spiritual darkness dwells, in mind, the judgment, and the conscience will be darkened, and will mistake the way to heavenly life. These things demand serious self-examination; and earnest prayer, that God would show us what we are, and whither we are going. ~ Matthew Henry

So likewise shall my heavenly Father do also to you, if you from your hearts forgive not every one his brother their trespasses. Matthew 18:35

There is a love that could change our homes, marriages, churches and the world and it is that love--a supernatural love that not only forgives our enemies but blesses them and actively works for their good--that will bring a world to Christ and make Christians genuine lights in a dark world.

Jesus is calling us to something absolutely beautiful.. the powerful love He gave us and that will transform the lives of everyone around us. But if we are still scrambling to get others to treat us as we ought--if we're focused on our own rights and our own feelings or pride, then we will never ever experience that joy or the partnering with the Lord to bring men to Christ or to see our brothers grow in the Lord.

If you will lose your life, you will find it. I have experienced so much of this in the last two years and have seen relationships transformed in my home and outside of my home. But we have to be willing to lay down our lives for our brothers, unconditionally, caring more for them and their needs than for our own.

What a joyful, fulfilling calling this is! This is walking in the light--when we walk in love. It's starts with death--to ourselves--and then living to Jesus. Since he loved you that way, and gave up his life for you, he also commands that you do the same for everyone around you.


I would like to challenge you today, to read through 1 John with an open heart. His message is that we are commanded to love our brother and if we aren't actively loving them, is it possible that you hate them? If we do, all we have to do is confess it and the Lord will forgive us.

Dear friends, there is absolutely no one we are allowed to reject, ignore, 'write off', be 'hurt' at, or withhold fellowship from. That is not Christian love and if we are doing that to anyone, it doesn't matter how much they have hurt us, it's time to die to our rights as regards that person and in fact go the 2nd mile and work for their good--pray for them--bless them.

It's not my standard dear friends, it's Christ's command--the only one He demands of us
today.

I know--it's the hardest thing in the world, in fact impossible, but the Lord can give you the grace. He wants to give you His love for that person, if you'll let Him. Love for enemies is non-optional. It's what sets us apart from the world and its brand of 'love'.

Won't you consider stepping out of the darkness of bitterness and hatred, and into the light of Christ's love for you and them?


Dear Lord,

I pray you would comfort those who are reading this and feel they just can't love someone in their life. You know their hurt and pain, and it grieves you too. But you ask us to leave judgement and correction in your hands. Vengeance is not ours but Yours. Divine mercy comes from you as well.

If my reader is angry, I pray you would help them to lay down those rights and submit to you and your commands. Lord you know all things and every situation.

May you fill those of us who call ourselves Christians with Your love and help us to quit relying on the frail and fickle love that comes from our own heart. May lives be transformed and changed, as we seek your face daily.

In Your Precious Name we pray,
Amen

[Mary Naeem]

Thanks Ramez